Herpes Dating Advice – Learn How to Disclose without Getting Dumped!

My name is Ed DeVinney. I’m not a licensed psychologist, doctor, or some kind of relationship guru; I’m just a brutally honest man with herpes who wants to give you some advice that’s worked well for me over the years.

Do You:

  • Feel massive stress and anxiety about confessing you have herpes to your partner?
  • Feel like giving up on dating because you’ve been rejected for having herpes?
  • Worry that you’ll never have a lasting relationship or sex again?

 Don’t give up, there is hope!

I’ve been breaking the news to people since 1994 when I was diagnosed with HSV-2. That’s one of the medical terms for genital herpes. I contracted it from a woman whom I was in a monogamous relationship with.

One morning I woke up to find my genitals covered in blisters! I was in the doctor’s office that afternoon and it wasn’t long after that, that I received the dreaded news over the phone. I felt like I had no control. How could this happen to me? Why didn’t she tell me?

Needless to say, I dumped her, but that couldn’t undo the damage that had already been done. I had gone from being Ed to “that guy with herpes”. Not only did I have herpes, I was back in the dating game with it.

And you know how hard dating with herpes is…

The next several years were filled with resentment, rejection, and no shortage of toxic relationships with people I never would have dated if I didn’t have herpes. Yes, it took its toll on me… and eventually I simply couldn’t take it anymore!

Telling Someone About Herpes Does NOT Have to Destroy Your Relationship!

I went on a bit of a mission to discover how to tell someone I had herpes without being rejected. Okay, so maybe it was a little more than a mission… it was my obsession. I was going to tell someone I had herpes without being rejected or die trying!

I hit the self-help section and psychology sections of the bookstore, spending hundreds of dollars on the most recommended titles. When I went broke at my local bookstore (they loved me there), I started becoming a frequent visitor to my local library.

I stumbled across some very interesting information over the years. It wasn’t enough to show me definitively how to have “The Herpes Talk” without rejection, but it was definitely a good place to start.

Educating yourself about herpes is very important!

I started experimenting with what I learned. A lot of it was surprising and much of it went against my natural instincts, but I was easily able to overcome that. I dove back into the dating scene armed with my new information and a brand new plan of attack.

Boom! I was immediately shot down. However, this time I persisted, and it wasn’t long before I started seeing some success. Over the next 5 years, pieces of the gigantic “herpes talk” jigsaw puzzle started coming together and I started seeing less and less rejection.

I became so good at it that I became the “go to guy” when any of my friends who had herpes were experiencing problems. I met this great person in the park and now it’s time to have “The Herpes Talk”?

Ask Ed! He’ll help you!

I have tons of experience with helping friends and my students have “The Herpes Talk” with their partners and now I am ready to help you the same way I’ve helped them.

So here are the 4 powerful herpes dating tips I promised.

How to Confess That You Have Herpes Without Being Dumped!

The Location Matters:

Make sure that you pick a place that has a strong emotional vibe. For example, an amusement park, carnival, putt-putt course, or entertainment center. The key here is the upbeat atmosphere provided by the lights, laughter, sounds and rides. This is a sure-fire tension killer that will lighten up the mood and make things go much smoother.

Stay Calm and Don’t Show Your Nervousness: 

Easier said than done I know. But if you appear outwardly nervous, your partner will pick up on that and won’t be able to take in what you’re telling them in a rational manner. Relax, control your emotions, and stay calm. Everything’s going to be fine.

Choose Your Words Wisely: 

Being blunt isn’t going to do you any favors. Neither is using scary words like “incurable,” “genital herpes,” and “contagious.” Instead, make your partner feel at easy by saying something like, “I have the virus that can cause herpes. It’s not as bad as it sounds. I take great care of myself and take medication that prevents outbreaks and keeps it from spreading.”

Start Educating Yourself: 

Face it, your partner is always going to have questions when you have the talk with them. You want to be able to explain exactly why the condition isn’t as terrible as it seems. The more you know about herpes, the more responsible and in control you’ll appear. This will put your partner at ease and they’ll be much more accepting.

 

May Peace Be With You All!

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